HOW TO LOVE ME

please be advised 

that everything i say on this stage

is to be taken quite literal

that every word spoken, 

no matter how unusual 

is meant to teach you a concept

so pivotal

a lesson so integral to

a message so powerful 

it’s too simple to go over

your heads, so listen close

i am a very simple individual 

my mind is made up of

ideas and facts ranging from

random to quizzical

(some might even say radical)

my imagination is seated on both

sides of the spectrum

from strange to beautiful 

my enthusiasm over the smallest

things are what make me most jovial

and my humor is rather hysterical 

lighthearted quips but i prefer

the dark stuff like my 

drinking rituals

so if you wanna make me laugh

please ensure to be comical

in your approach to being

conversational accompanied with 

a bottle of Jack Daniel’s 

and i love hypotheticals

provide a scenario and 

i’ll go off on a never ending 

ramble consisting of complex

babble mixed with answers

most inexplicable 

the likes of which you’ve never

heard from any one intellectual 

i also possess a hunger

somewhat insatiable 

whether a craving for knowledge 

be it on paper, digital

audio, visual

or a dish made from your hands

tender and delectable 

my desire to consume what

is presented by you is a show

of my heart’s unconditional 

LOVE is foundational

solid ground on which we stand

is not as crackable and yet

a feat not as feasible 

so in order for this to work

you have to be teachable

with that being said, i’d like to

learn you in the ways to love me

in a method numerical 

1. time is valuable

don’t waste yours if you don’t mean

to make it for mine,

because the last thing i need is

another “it’s not you, it’s me”

how trivial

1. effort is meaningful

if faith speaks, then actions scream

should your approach be

purposeful or whimsical

may you carry intent

to be intentional

i just ask you be original

1. know that i’m not invisible 

i desire to be seen

loved, hugged on and heard of

through the highs, lows

and by any means ——

necessary are these words

you could even say, it’s critical

you understand who i am

so this relationship can run

at optimal ——

there are levels to me

and how regretful, i hold blame to

to the parts i’ve played in my

efforts to find love, uncomfortable 

yet my heart laid a foundation 

consisting of constructed conditionals 

not to mention the idea of a being 

in a relationship seems unreachable

plus, i desire constant reassurance

so please make it believable 

now before you get judgmental

go easy on me, my ego is quite fragile

when i get in a mood

i’m in my head more than usual

my pride and i treat porn and 

masturbation as medicinals

my depression is probably clinical

i’ve done damage to my physical

overworking my mental 

overtaxing my emotional

overthinking is seasonal

under appreciating my spiritual

all the while God, faith and prayer

remain as optional as my 

life seems just as disposable 

question…

do you still have what it takes

to love someone so pitiful?

…

yeah

i didn’t think so