A letter to lust

i've come awaken awaken

no longer have i been taken

captive by the false iteration

in that deserted land which you had

left me forsaken, i hunger and thirst

for more of the reality you had been faking

while i rot in the filth of the

actions i've undertaken

you lied to me, shoved crap

down my throat and had the audacity

to call it mere satisfaction

i onlt ever came back to you

looking for more from you

but sadly, i didn't

my days were spent more toward the obvious

i was hidden in plain sight

dealing with my demons, so cancerous

the nights were given my every last breath

as my eyes grew weary giving into my

weaknesses

my body suffered constant pains and aches

that i could barely bear to bear with me

traveling towards meaninglessness

my mind corrupted by the very thoughts

i run from and to and fro

i'm pretty messed up; if i'm honest

the gentle voice that urges me to listen

keeps convicting me of my trespasses

it's so convincing

it convinced me that i'm still loved

despite the stupidity of my iniquities

i'm stuck with my selfish ambitions

i need forgiveness but am i really worth it

You said to me that I AM

made in Your image and not of my transgressions

God give me strength to fight back

the tears while i'm up here putting down

my humble confessions

speaking of transgressions

i'm skeptical, i doubt this'll even be worth admitting

to be honest, i'm quite scared to speak this

knowing judgmental eyes are out there sitting

waiting for me to slip up despite the fact i'm human

but does that really matter, i know i'll never be perfect

it's an unrealistic expectation that has most of our lives hidden

scared to be the thing we've been since birth, imperfect

but i guess that's the price we pay trying to buy

into things that are worthless

protective of my imagery

i sought for you in secrecy

did quick work with your infantry

i found you, you defeated me

i fought for what seems like centuries

to no avail, it just gets worse for me

mind, body and spiritually

and leading me to my casualty

i never listened to the voice

i was so pretentious

apathetic toward consequences

that would leave me hurt

and self-conscious

your desires were so monstrous

yet your rewards were preposterous

never did i gain the satisfaction

that you ever promised

for years we have danced this

too long have done this

led, used and abused, i've had it

you've had your fun, sin

and i never thought i'd say this

but i'm done with the reckless living

lest i suffer a penalty that He already

made payment

LUST, I QUIT.